Life's Love Affair

Certain behaviours and their definition often leave me in a Google Rabbit Hole, and this is one of those topics. Have you ever seen someone behave so badly and their response is something like that reads like ” I’m so sure of myself”.

No my dear, you’re very arrogant. There’s a difference and your behaviour ain’t giving confidence right now.

I am convinced that, like many aspects of life, we often confuse and misuse certain words to the point that their meanings blur to suit the situations, but it’s not. It’s common for us to mistakenly interchange them, That is why knowing our worth and speaking out when we’re taken for granted is sometimes considered arrogance while playing small and letting someone take credit is acceptable.

There are also instances when people talk a big game, see everything as a competition and are praised even called Confident.

We need to talk about this,

But first let’s define the terms

What is confidence ?

Confidence is the feeling or belief that one can have faith in or rely on someone or something.

My favourite way to put it is

I’m not perfect and I give room for growth and am open to constructive feedback

Confident people are grounded, not loud

They know their strengths and own their flaws

They don’t dominate, they make space for others to shine too

They’re not afraid to ask questions or admit they’re wrong .

Now that we understand Confidence. Let’s meet Arrogance

What is Arrogance?

The Merriam Webster dictionary defines Arrogance as “an attitude of superiority manifested in an overbearing manner or in presumptuous claims or assumptions”. Also called Ego.

Arrogance puts on a show, they act like they know it all because they’re scared that they’re unsure or no one will see them

Signs of Arrogance include

1. Belitting others to boost themselves
2. They need constant validation
3. They see everything as a competition even when it isn’t
4. They avoid feedback like a plague

Arrogance needs the spotlight. Confidence becomes the spotlight, even when it’s standing in the back row.

Now that we know the difference

How can we ensure that when our ego gets the best of us, we do not let it blind us?

Let’s be honest the line between showing up boldly and showing off can get blurry.

How to build confidence without slipping into Arrogance

We know that Confidence is rooted in self-awareness, not ego and in staying grounded. Let these tips help you show up boldly.

Lead with Curiosity

I’ve come to realise that I don’t know everything and we learn every day. With that, Ask questions even if people might look at you funny, Stay Open, Confident people learn and are always open to learn

Celebrate Without Flexing

Confidence shares win with gratitude, not superiority.

Practice Active Listening

One piece of advice I’ve received over the years, but have often struggled to put into practice, is the importance of listening. Listening is a powerful way to show up authentically and to learn more about others. Confident individuals value the voices of those around them, rather than silencing them or speaking over them.

Value Feedback

Now I know, not all feedbacks need to be listened to, but when it’s from trusted individuals it’s worth giving an ear to.

Confidence states: “That’s helpful — I will work on it.” Arrogance states: “They are just jealous.

One grows, while the other remains stuck. Choose wisely.

Watch your Inner Voice

When your self-talk is compassionate and stable, your external energy will resonate with that positivity. Take a moment to reflect before you put yourself on display.

Confidence invites people in. Arrogance pushes them away.

Confidence inspires. It empowers. It builds bridges.

Arrogance isolates. It intimidates. It burns them.

As women, creatives, entrepreneurs, and anyone who’s ever been underestimated, we deserve to be loud in love with ourselves. To walk into a room and not apologise for showing up fully.

Confidence is not arrogance. It’s clarity, courage, and character wrapped in one.

Over to You

Have you ever struggled with balancing confidence and humility? Let’s chat in the comments!

And what does Confidence mean to you?